


two stooges and their idiot friend

by balsa



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Coming Out, Gay Panic, Gen, M/M, bisexual kaoru hakaze, chatfic, idiot trio - Freeform, its exactly what you think, izumi and chiaki are good friends, kaoru has a gay crisis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:14:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28381527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/balsa/pseuds/balsa
Summary: kaokun:this dude's ass looks really nice and i can’t stop looking at it when hes around..?kaokun:but like im not gay I thinkkaokun:idk does that make me gay…senacchi: …?
Relationships: Hakaze Kaoru & Morisawa Chiaki & Sena Izumi, Hakaze Kaoru/Sakuma Rei
Comments: 2
Kudos: 74





	two stooges and their idiot friend

**Author's Note:**

> hi i really like the izumi/kaoru/chiaki trio and i really like reikao so i combined them  
> uh minor warning for mentioned outing but its only mentioned like once and its not major

**three stooges**

**kaokun:** guys

 **kaokun:** i have a dilemma

 **senacchi:** what do you want

 **kaokun:** ouch, senacchi ~ u make it seem as if u don’t care

 **kaokun:** my poor feelings T_T

 **senacchi:** you know I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t care -_-

 **senacchi:** just tell us your “dilemma” or whatever

 **kaokun:** aww senacchi u tsun <3

 **senacchi:** i want to strangle you

 **kaokun:** im not into that tho?

 **senacchi:** careful kaokun

 **senacchi:** keep making sex jokes with guys and people will start thinking you’re gay

 **kaokun:** ok about that

 **kaokun:** _@moricchi_ where tf are u

 **senacchi:** ?

 **senacchi:** kaokun

 **senacchi:** kaokun what’s going on are you having a gay crisis

 **kaokun:** NO

 **kaokun:** i am not

 **kaokun:** i just have a question I need to ask u guys

 **kaokun:** _@moricchi_ WHERE ARE U

 **moricchi:** Hello! Sorry I’m late!

 **moricchi:** Nagumo was in a panic over planning our latest live and requested my help, but now I’m here!

 **moricchi:** Is everything alright, Hakaze? Do you need us to do something for you?

 **kaokun:** uhhh

 **kaokun:** ok u guys have to promise not to laugh at me

 **senacchi:** sounds like something youd say before you tell us something stupid enough to make us laugh at you

 **kaokun:** senacchi :(

 **senacchi:** okay okay sorry for teasing

 **senacchi:** what’s up

 **kaokun:** ok so

 **kaokun:** like

 **kaokun:** this dude

 **kaokun:** will not be saying who

 **kaokun:** looks really good in jeans

 **kaokun:** like his ass looks really nice and i can’t stop looking at it when hes around..?

 **kaokun:** but like im not gay I think

 **kaokun:** idk does that make me gay…

 **senacchi** : …?

 **senacchi:** are you talking about sakuma

 **senacchi:** his ass really does look nice in jeans

 **kaokun:** THATS NOT THE POINT???

 **senacchi:** was I right though

 **kaokun:** i hate u

 **kaokun:** yes fine whatever its rei-kun

 **kaokun:** NOW ANSWER MY QUESTION

 **moricchi:** I don’t have a lot of experience with gay panics so I cannot help you! My apologies!

 **kaokun:** ?

 **kaokun:** arent u w kanata??

 **moricchi:** HAH?

 **moricchi:** No, no, no, you are severely mistaken! Kanata is my good friend! We are not dating!

 **moricchi:** I mean, I am bisexual and have always accepted that part of myself and that is why I cannot help you!!! But I am not dating Kanata!!

 **senacchi:** lol

 **senacchi:** ook moricchi

 **senacchi:** anyways

 **moricchi:** Sena..

 **senacchi:** i said nothing

 **senacchi:** ok whatever

 **senacchi:** kaokun it isn’t really as black and white as you’re making it out to be?

 **kaokun:** huh

 **kaokun:** what does that mean

 **senacchi:** okay so like

 **senacchi:** you thinking sakuma’s ass looks hot in jeans doesn’t make you gay

 **kaokun:** oh thank god

 **senacchi:** but

 **kaokun:** oh god

 **senacchi:** you might still like boys

 **senacchi:** or even just sakuma idk

 **senacchi:** have you ever felt attraction to sakuma other than staring at his ass

 **kaokun:** um

 **kaokun:** i dunno

 **kaokun:** whats classified as “attraction”

 **senacchi:** ffs

 **senacchi:** have you ever looked at sakuma and felt the same thing you feel for hot girls

 **senacchi:** or had the same feelings for him that you’ve had for your previous girlfriends

 **kaokun:** mayyyybeee????

 **kaokun:** this is confusing senacchi ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

 **senacchi:** do you think maybe you just have a crush on him

 **senacchi:** sometimes the shit you say about him is enough to make people side eye you

 **kaokun:** HUHHH like what

 **senacchi:** “ugh sakuma-san is so perfect it’s so annoying” “why does he look that pretty today” “i’m not gay but dude rei-kun has such sexy abs”

 **senacchi:** need I say more

 **kaokun:** OK OK OK

 **kaokun:** I GET IT

 **kaokun:** ughhhh this is a mess

 **kaokun:** am i gay for rei-kun

 **kaokun:** senacchi tell me

 **senacchi:** maybe a little kaokun

 **kaokun:** UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 **kaokun:** how will I ever look him in the eyes again

 **kaokun:** oh god I like rei-kun this is horrible

 **kaokun:** has he ever even liked anyone i dont remember him liking anyone

 **kaokun:** maybe he liked anzu-chan?

 **kaokun:** OH GOD HE’S STRAIGHT

 **Sena!!!** > **chiakun**

 **Sena!!!:** he’s so fucking stupid

 **chiakun:** Don’t be mean, Sena! It’s his first!

 **Sena!!!:** i mean yeah but jesus does he have to be such an idiot

 **chiakun:** He hasn’t acknowledged his attraction to men until now, how would he recognize it in other people?

 **Sena!!!:** besides the fact that sakuma has been head over heels for him since forever and everybody and their mother knows besides kaokun?? gee idk

 **chiakun:** …

 **chiakun:** Fair!

**three stooges**

**kaokun:** HELLO where did u guys go.

 **kaokun:** leaving me alone in such a time of distress ｡ﾟ･（>﹏<）･ﾟ｡ im so hurt

 **senacchi:** we’re here drama queen

 **senacchi:** listen kaokun it really isn’t that serious if you like sakuma we’ve all gone through it

 **kaokun:** .. what

 **senacchi:** he’s the most beautiful guy in our grade? after me of course

 **senacchi:** everybody has wanted him at some point in their lives

 **kaokun:** huh

 **Moricchi:** It’s true!

 **kaokun:** i

 **kaokun:** ok I guess

 **kaokun:** but is he straight

 **senacchi:** dear lord kaokun

 **senacchi:** ask him yourself

 **kaokun:** ARE U CRAZY

 **senacchi:** no

 **senacchi:** sorry to break it to you, kaokun, but you can’t go around asking other people if someone is gay

 **senacchi:** you’ve got to ask them directly

 **senacchi:** otherwise you’re just being an asshole and risking unintentionally outing them

 **senacchi:** even if they’ve been a bit obvious

 **kaokun:** FINE ill ask

 **kaokun:** if i get totally humiliated im blaming u

 **senacchi:** yeah yeah

 **senacchi:** tell us how it goes

 **moricchi:** I am cheering you on, Hakaze! Good luck!

 **kaokun:** thx 4 the help guys <3

 **senacchi:** a heart? are you gay for us kaokun

 **senacchi:** [ _giggling.gif_ ]

 **kaokun:** i take it back.

 **Kaoru <3** > **rei-kun :/**

 **Kaoru <3:** rei-kun

 **rei-kun :/:** YYes Kaorukun?

 **Kaoru <3:** i need 2 ask u something

 **Kaoru <3:** sorry if its ridiculous

 **rei-kun :/:** Nothingg is ridiculous If you ask, Koaru-kun

 **Kaoru <3:** jnoa;knjfe

 **rei-kun :/:** ??? Is evertyhing alright

 **Kaoru <3:** yes im fine

 **Kaoru <3:** ok im ab to ask u something

 **Kaoru <3:** maybe its a little weird

 **Kaoru <3:** and just answer honestly please

 **Kaoru <3:** and dont bring it up again

 **rei-kun :/:** Hwatevr you say Kaoru-kun

 **Kaoru <3:** ok

 **Kaoru <3:** ok ok ok

 **Kaoru <3:** uh

 **Kaoru <3:** do u like guys

 **rei-kun :/:** ?

 **rei-kun :/:** Ar e you joking

 **Kaoru <3:** NVM

 **Kaoru <3**: FORGET I ASKED

 **rei-kun :/:** Kaoru-kun

 **rei-kun :/:** Kaoru

 **rei-kun :/:** Kaoru I am gay

 **Kaoru <3:** What

 **rei-kun :/:** I like only men I am gay

 **Kaoru <3:** i

 **Kaoru <3:** i literally thought u liked anzu-chan i

 **rei-kun :/:** What

 **rei-kun :/:** LOL

 **rei-kun :/:** No no Kaoru- kun I do not and have never like d the producer

 **rei-kun :/:** Anzu chan is like a sister to mee

 **Kaoru <3:** well

 **Kaoru <3:** ok

 **Kaoru <3:** thank u for answering honestly

 **rei-kun :/:** No pro,belm

 **rei-kun :/:** Did you need anyhtingelse?

 **Kaoru <3:** no

 **Kaoru <3:** thanks

 **rei-kun :/:** Sure Kaoru-kun

**three stooges**

**kaokun:** U KNEW

 **senacchi:** ?

 **kaokun:** THAT REIKUN IS GAY

 **kaokun:** U KNEW’

 **senacchi:** well yeah lol

 **senacchi:** he doesn’t really try to hide it

 **kaokun:** WHY DID U MAKE ME ASK HIM

 **senacchi** : because I wasn’t lying about asking people about their sexuality directly

 **senacchi:** if we had just told you sakuma’s sexuality that lesson would’ve been useless

 **kaokun:** yea but it was so EMBARRASSING

 **kaokun:** I feel like an idiot

 **senacchi:** you are an idiot

 **kaokun:** dont be mean to me

 **senacchi:** :|

 **senacchi:** okay so you know sakuma’s gay

 **senacchi:** what now

 **kaokun:** I DONT KNOW

 **kaokun:** do u think he likes me omg

 **Sena!!!** > **chiakun**

 **Sena!!!:** i’m gonna murder him

 **chiakun:** DON’T DO THAT

**three stooges**

**senacchi:** idk kaokun maybe you should ask him yourself again

 **kaokun:** DONT BE CRYPTIC

 **kaokun:** im on the verge of a breakdown I just figured out I like dudes and it was because i thought my unitmates ass wa s hot in jeans and I realized I like him a lot and now i need to figure out if he likes me too I dont need this

 **senacchi:** woah kaokun i was joking

 **senacchi:** are you actually upset

 **kaokun:** YES im freaking out this is all new to me idk what the fuck im gonna do

 **senacchi:** kaokun

 **senacchi:** you’ve always liked guys you just repressed it for too long and it’s all coming out now

 **senacchi:** it’s not really new to you when you think about it

 **senacchi:** just go about it like you would if you were pursuing a girl interested in you

 **senacchi:** you already know sakuma is gay so there shouldn’t be a problem with that

 **kaokun:** hhh

 **kaokun:** has he showed interest in me like ever

 **kaokun:** honestly

 **senacchi:** honestly? he likes you so much it’s kinda pathetic to sit by and watch as you two dance around each other

 **senacchi:** actually no you’re the only person dancing around

 **senacchi:** he’s been trying to drop hints for like years

 **kaokun:** what

 **moricchi:** Hakaze, what Sena said is right! Sakuma is very obvious with his affection for you

 **kaokun:** fuck

 **kaokun:** cfuck

 **kaokun:** ok brb guys

 **senacchi:** what are you doing

 **senacchi:** kaokun

 **senacchi:** kaokun if you spontaneously confess to sakuma I will personally murder you

 **Kaoru <3** > **rei-kun**

 **Kaoru <3:** rei-kun

 **rei-kun:** Ykes Kaoru-kun??;

 **Kaoru <3:** i like men

 **Kaoru <3:** too

 **Kaoru <3:** im bi I think

 **rei-kun:** Oh

 **rei-kun:** Well thank youi for trustibg me enough to tell me

 **rei-kun:** It must’ve, been hard I’m proud of you

 **Kaoru <3:** i

 **Kaoru <3:** thanks

 **Kaoru <3:** ok bye now

 **rei-kun:** Kukuku

 **rei-kun:** Byebye KAorukun

**three stooges**

**kaokun:** ok i told reikun im bi

 **senacchi:** is that all you told him

 **kaokun:** YES senacchi

 **kaokun:** im not impulsive

 **senacchi:** sure thing kaokun

 **senacchi:** well how does it feel

 **senacchi:** welcome to LGBT

 **moricchi:** Welcome!

 **kaokun:** welcome to LGBT?/?@?’;1

 **kaokun:** what the hell is wrong with u

 **senacchi:** okay then stingy bitch see if i’m ever nice to you again

 **senacchi:** fuck you

 **senacchi** has left “ **three stooges** ”

 **kaokun:** damn

 **kaokun:** looks like its just us moricchi

 **moricchi:** How many times has he left

 **kaokun:** idk i lost count

**Author's Note:**

> im planning on making more enstars chatfics so drop requests id youd like to see anything,,, thank u for reading, leave a kudos if u liked the read maybe


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